We have an IMMEDIATE OPENING for a General Officer to lead a major U.S. Air Force command into combat.
Responsibilities include: organizing, maintaining and deploying a heavier-than-air, death-centric organization.
Other responsibilities include:
Distribution of combat-ready flying machines to lay waste upon enemies from afar.
Use of heat and energy to transform foreign human beings into atoms.
Sudden conversion of large cities into glass parking lots.
Manifestation of the song lyric: ‘it's a hard rain's a-gonna fall’
Requirements:
Knowledge of airplanes, missiles, bombs
Awareness of the earth and its features (land, sea, air, etc.)
Able to work weekends and evenings as needed.
Preferred candidates will demonstrate:
A fondness for the Art of War, by Sun Tzu
Comfort with the use of swear words
Easy-going, friendly leadership style.
Send resume , cover letter and salary requirements to president@whitehouse.gov
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